Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
