if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
