Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
