Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Randomize
