You don't have asthma, your pregnant
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
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