My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
