HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize