Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Randomize