she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
