How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Randomize
