I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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