Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Randomize
