I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
