There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
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