I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
