we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
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