Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
