is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
