i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
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