i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
someone get that fucking seahorse.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize