If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Randomize
