Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Randomize
