I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
