question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
