return my video game
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
