help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
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