"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Randomize
