You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize
