dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
