Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Randomize
