I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
bring money and cleavage
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Randomize
