i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
