Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
