Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
how drunk are you?
Several
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Randomize