She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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