Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
