I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Randomize