how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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