was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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