You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
