well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Randomize
