what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
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