ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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