it wasn't lemon gatorade
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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