Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
