An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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