U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
