remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
