Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
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