Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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